Anna the Adventurist
It didn't really hit me until the HR lady stared at me and asked "But WHY are you leaving?"
Up to that point I'd been treated to a most satisfying range of reactions. Authentic enthusiasm, admiration. Envy. From those probably wiser than me, a hint of disappointment. But this was blunt. This was what-the-heck-are-you-doing sort of stuff.
I know that thought has crossed many a friend's mind, be it last week, last year, upon leaving uni, upon arriving at uni. “What am I doing with my life?” At least, that thought darn sure follows me everywhere.
A confession here. I like to know about stuff, and I especially like to know about the stuff that melds itself into this thing called my life. To do lists, New Year's resolutions, five year plans – I have them all. Neatly recorded in a notebook, obviously.
But I got to this point where I knew exactly what I was doing. I just didn’t particularly like it. And I didn’t know what I should be doing instead. What I did know was that it had to be something else. Something not necessarily sensible. But definitely something exciting.
Unfortunately, I’ve been trained up as a lawyer the past couple of years. This was a real barrier. It meant terror, genuine terror at the thought of uncertainty, of wasting a five year degree, of taking a risk, basically.
So why am I leaving? How did I get to the point of deciding my immediate next step should be to traipse through the mountains of the South Island?
Truth is, I am not entirely sure of the answer to either of those questions. I just know I’m in my element when facing the elements. And I know I am leaving because I wasn’t in my element pouring over yet another markup of a contract.